UNC + Duke = Hate
You know you ain’t in Kansas no more when the guy at the Marriott check-in desk has just as many letters missing from his name as teeth from his mouth. Arvin (as he was called) then proceeded to tell me about the fierce rivalry between the Duke fans in Durham and the UNC folks in nearby Chapel Hill, ending with “to hate like this, is to be happy forever.”
If those aren’t words to live by then I don’t know what are.
“Reliving” things
Ooooooh…I really, really hate when people say that you can “relive” something because you manage to record it on a video camera. Like those cheesy ads, “…video can let you relive your wedding the way nothing else can.” I call bullshit.
Until someone actually invents some crazy Matrix/Dollhouse/Total Recall type technology where I can plug into a chair, put on a helmet or wear some day-glo metal hairnet that tricks my brain into thinking other shit is happening to my body then no, I’m not “reliving” anything. I’m busy trying to get living right the first time, stop trying to make me do it twice.
Really. Cause it’s not even raining out. I can’t stand preemptive dressing. Guess what? If it’s not raining don’t wear rainboots just because they’re in fashion and cost $200
Novelty Burgers
I hate these because I love the burger so much. In its purity it is a perfect, simple and elegant meal, the unique american sandwich. So no, I don’t want BBQ pork, or jalapeño poppers or crab legs or grilled cheese sandwiches or any of your silly ideas on it! Bun. Patty. Cheese. Bacon/Lettuce/Tomato. Condiment. Put anything else you want on the plate but leave my damn burger alone.
Au Bon Pain
- Eddie: Au Bon Pain, hate it. Really, really hate it actually...ever since Cambridge where it was a source of stale, bland misery. Every time I pass one I cringe.
- Charlotte: I can't tell if Alexa hacked into your account or not.
- Alexa: I didn't hack. Though I also wasn't sure if I had written that or not.
I hate Uggs
Pick your feet up when you walk. Uggs are inexcusable.
created by: CCG + EM
